I now work for a company that sells new and used tires, along with various automobile services. I thought that maybe this new sales venture would result in less “Stupid is” stories, but HOLY CRAP was I wrong.

I went from fools that endangered the lives of pets, to fools that endanger their own lives and those around them. I am constantly amazed at how reckless people are with their cars. Everything from tires with the metal belts sticking out, to major brake components falling off and everything in between.

Who is the worse? TAXI CABS! I don’t think I will voluntarily enter a taxi cab ever again. The last one I worked on should not have been allowed on the road, and this knucklehead puts used tires on it to pass his inspection.

So the other day I watch a brand new Mercedes roll into our parking lot. I’m thinking maybe some new tires and possibly alignment, or some brakes. Then the guy gets out and proceeds to walk over to our used tire rack, located on the outside wall. Ok, maybe this is for his kids car or something…. NOPE!

My first question is, “Sir, are you looking for some NEW tires for your vehicle?”

“O no, no he says, I need some used tires”

I then go and get the size of his tires, still not believing that this is really happening, and start to look for his size. At this point I’m trying to justify everything, maybe he has a nail and needs a temporary? WRONG again!

Of course his tire size is low-profile, and probably one of the most difficult to find used. The reason is that they wear faster than normal tires, due to softer rubber for performance grip. By the time we change a customer’s tires they are already worn very badly, making them unfit for resale.

Somehow I managed to find two tires for this guy, about $30 ea plus $12 to install… not too bad for rare tires.

Now is when the real fun begins. He starts yelling at me that they are WORN, that they don’t match, and the price is too high!!! To top it off he looks at me and asks “what’s the warranty?”

I look at him obviously puzzled, and said “Um… these are used.” It was almost difficult not to laugh at this point, not the fact that he was buying used for a new Mercedes, but that he was serious about the other things.

To make a list, he wanted FOUR used tires, they had to be brand new, all must match, they had to be the right size, must have a warranty, and be practically free, and we can’t charge him labor to install… for his 09 Mercedes.

He ended up throwing the tire on the floor and walking out after I refused his offer of $40 out the door. (no taxes, no install) TAKE A HIKE!

This man was of a particular foreign origin, but due to the sissy nature of this country, I cannot mention his sandy homeland.

Hey, I totally respect a person if they choose to buy three sets of used tires a year($500) instead of buying one set that lasts for 5($450), even if they lose more money that way. Everyone is an expert and has their own opinions. (even me)

-bryan j bailey